Tag Archives: mama

Key to My Style

Key to my maternity style

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Hello lovely,

So nice of you to be stopping by. I am so grateful for you and the time you are devoting to read this and/or watch the beautiful pictures.

This time I am sharing with you the incredible results of a fashion-pregnancy photo shoot I had with the amazing Dorota from Dorann Photography.

Dorota chose Johnston Gardens as the place for the shoot and I was so happy with this choice.

The whole experience was incredible, she made me feel very relaxed. I get pretty awkward when being photographed by others and that feeling disappeared after first few minutes.

I am so happy and emotional looking at those pictures. They will forever remain an incredible memory. The fact that we are reaching our 10th wedding anniversary with my husband this year and this is exactly the place where our wedding pictures were taken adds to the magic of the whole experience.

I wanted to wear something that is me, something colourful, because you know what a colour freak I am, and because this is our rainbow baby.

I was hoping that my gratefulness for being in the blessed state will be seen in the pictures and I see it, thanks to Dorota… but I also wanted to show a piece of me, of who I am as a mother but also as a woman. I wanted to show my beautiful growing bump but also parts of me that I love and appreciate. I always talk to you about how you should love yourself and I need to do that for myself too. Every day in an opportunity to remind ourselves of that and today is the day ;))

We have been super blessed in Aberdeen over the past month of so with the gorgeous sunny weather and I have been loving wearing all sorts of dresses. I have also been changing multiple times a day. My husband always laughs that I change 3-4 times every day and I say that I see no issue if I am home and able to do so. I have always loved playing dress up and I now live a life where I can do that for a living… . I also feel that being pregnant adds to that. I mean, most of you pregnant ladies out there will probably be able to relate to the discomfort of itchy skin, sweating, swelling and other totally normal but not always easy to deal with aspects of pregnancy. Back when I was pregnant with Beno, working at the check-in after I grounded myself from flying, I was extremely uncomfortable for weeks, having to wear a uniform, tights right over my bump and sit for hours… .

Now I couldn’t be more excited to channel my inner self and enjoy the outfits I love.

On those pictures I wanted to show versatility of one dress.  I put together few options: one quite formal option (with the red dress over the yellow one, or the black one, through a date with husband kind of an option (short dress on it’s own) to a picnic version. While looking back at last few weeks and now those pictures I realised that this post also represents who I am and can be in one single day 😉

I hope it will inspire you to wear whatever it is you feel like wearing when off work (if you wear a uniform at work like I used to) or at work if you lucky enough to be your own boss. Remember to fall in love with parts of you that need it and have some fun. When I say fall in love with, I don’t mean those obviously beautiful parts. I can now officially say I love my feet. Couple of years ago I’d ask Dorota not to photograph my feet up close, now I am simply grateful to have feet that take me places and allow me to wear incredibly beautiful shoes.

Thank you so much Dorota for the day of the shoot and for capturing what I didn’t imagine was possible.

If any of you look for a photographer, baby picture, family, wedding, party, fashion, branding… Dorota has an experience in all that and more. Check out her page bellow:

https://www.facebook.com/dorann.photography/

For the pictures, see bellow and comment 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have a super day.

Love,

Gosia

 

Key to My Style

Key to my happiness

6 Comments

 

 

There is no key…. there isn’t. The key is me. I lost the awareness of it for a while. First time, when I finally had a life that I love. When my marriage was finally on the track that I envisioned, meaning kids. I got so happy that I remember telling my husband that I am so content that even if we stay in the flat that we are in at the moment for many more years, I am happy and will be. I couldn’t wait to see his smile and approval. I did not see it though. Instead I saw disappointment. ‘Are you kidding me’ He said…. It took me a while to understand that it does not mean that he isn’t as happy as I am, and it does not mean that he is embarrassed to live where we do. It simply means that he wants better for us and our family. So I got so confused with the whole happiness and for a while I stayed that way.

I recently suffered another miscarriage. I lost a boy that is, second boy to be exact. When we lost Zac (first miscarriage) I was fully and utterly devoted to sadness and ‘blameness’, so much so that I opened myself to hearing it and accepting it from others. So much so that all I was telling myself was that ‘I lost a baby’, ‘I am not pregnant’, ‘Everyone else is pregnant or getting pregnant’ , ‘Everyone else has two or more children and they are not even trying’.

The game of comparison is our unique and tailor made hell. There is no escape. The is no help. No matter how hard we try we loose. I was loosing.  Don’t take me wrong when that happened, Ben our first born was just over one year old and not only he kept me alive, he healed me daily too and I was also happy.

But I know now, and I finally feel it and get it, after loosing Gabriel (our second loss), that I cannot rely on my children, number of years between them, their health or their moods to make me happy. I cannot control any of that fully and it is simply not fair to depend on my children to make mama happy. That’s bullshit! I need to keep ‘my cup full’ and overflowing to share the happiness and make the best use of my talents and blessings to keep my family well.

There is one thing I always used to say as a little girl. I’d say ‘I am always happy, I just have bad days sometimes’. I don’t think I fully understood it then but I felt it and isn’t that the key? Feeling the life as opposed to overthinking it? It surely doesn’t serve me well when I do that. When I do that, I let fear decide and I focus on obstacles instead of being driven to grow.

So today, my message to self is, feel it girl, whatever you trying to think and overthink, drop it, step outside, dream it and dance your life like no one is watching. I have tangibly felt how fragile life is. It didn’t happen when I was ready and nothing else will. I can live a life that I desire today and today I do.

No matter what people tell me, I smile, I put make up on, I dress up, I have fun, I cry, I sing, I share my story and I heal. I don’t care about what is appropriate and what ‘should’ be done now. I am HAPPY and I always will.

Here is to crazy happy today.

I wish all of you bad days, good days, crazy days, fun filled ones and happy life.

Here are few of my very good days ;))

 

 

 

 

Love,

Gosia